Four months ago, someone mentioned Fresh Breasts on the Big Boob Problems subreddit, and I couldn’t wait to try it. Maybe I did something wrong, but this product didn’t work for me. Here’s a rundown of the two days that I tried it.
Day 1
8:56 AM squeezed a handful of product out of the tube and rubbed it over and under my breasts
9:03 AM top of breasts dry
9:07 AM under breasts still wet
9:12 AM under breasts still wet while sitting at computer; icky feeling
9:20 AM still wet
9:44 AM still really wet
9:59 AM still wet
10:23 AM still moist but powderier
10:58 AM tacky . . . not quite dry
11:32 AM dry-ish
12:12 PM mostly dry
12:40 PM dry (if very slightly tacky)
1:24 PM totally wet again from sweat
Day 2
I decided to use a smaller amount this time and to follow the instructions to “shake well before use” (although it doesn’t feel very effective to shake a tube full of product).
9:40 AM applied product
9:58 AM left breast almost completely dry . . . only slightly tacky in the crease
9:59 AM completely dry left breast; almost dry right breast
10:00 AM right breast completely dry. Sat braless at sewing machine. The area where my breasts rested on my torso felt dry, soft and pleasant.
11:04 AM hot and a little sweaty . . . slightly moist where breasts rested on torso
1:30 PM completely wet after sweeping back porch
The same company makes Fresh Balls, and I get the feeling that a group of guys thought their product could do double duty for women. But this copy from their website makes me think that they just don’t get it:
“Let’s face it, how many more times can you walk into a room and let your boob sweat-soaked shirt make the first impression for you? Boob sweat, or “swoobs,” is a common, and uncomfortable, problem most women have to deal with daily – until now!”
Or maybe I’m the one who isn’t getting it. Do YOUR shirts typically show two sweaty orbs that result in “uncomfortable and awkward arm-crossed encounters”? For me it’s all about underboob sweat, and unless I’m going braless, I don’t get the tell-tale wet crescents showing through my tee shirts. What I get is the gross feeling of sweat trickling between and beneath my breasts, and the helpless realization that my dry bra will soon be drenched. But I never worry about my shirt itself being drenched.
The instructions say to “reapply if needed” and to “wash your hands” after you apply. Given how long it takes this product to dry beneath DD+ breasts, it simply isn’t practical to reapply throughout the day–it’s barely practical to apply after a shower in the morning. And it’s kind of messy. If you don’t wash your hands, they’ll turn white. The same white looks like snow salt stains on your breasts. And yes, it rubs off onto your bra.
If anyone wants the rest of my tube of Fresh Breasts, let me know and I’ll ship it to you (domestically)! And if you have a better experience with this product than I did, we want to hear all about it.
In the meantime, I enjoyed wearing my cotton-lined Fraulein Annie Falling in Love bra all day today without feeling a single trickle of sweat. I’ll give a full review here soon.
Need more help with stay-cool options this summer? Here are some of our past posts on the subject:
You’ve Lost that Soggy Feeling
Best Breasts Forward: Hot Mama
Big Bust Heat Wave Bras and Strappy Tops
Best Breasts Forward: Sweating Through Summer
Staying Cool
Summertime and the Living is Strappy
Thanks to commenters on Mia’s last post and Big Boob Problems, here are two more products that I’d like to try:
Monistat Complete Care Chafing Relief Powder Gel
Pure Romance Between the Sheets Powder Spray
My easy, low budget way of handling underboob sweat is baby powder and a makeup brush (I use the kind with a telescopic handle and a top so I don’t have powder everywhere). Each morning after I shower and dry thoroughly under my boobs, I put some baby powder on the brush and spread it neatly under each boob. No sweat or icky feeling the entire day.
After 2 decades with the same afflication–and I’m 31!–I HAVE COME UPON THE BIG BUSTED HOLY GRAIL! And it’s noteven filled with chemicals or synthetics (ah, ace bandages!) that make us all the more sweaty.
It’s a miracle called bamboo rayon. (which just means its a fabric primarily made of bamboo. As an experiment, I sewd it inthe interior of my 30 D bras, and after a long, sweaty day, the only area of my body that wasn’t wet–pardon, TOTALLY DRY? the recently spiffed up bra.NB its needs to be at least 90% bamboo rayon or more.And, sure, I know I sound like I’m about to throw a tickertape parade, but if y’all don’t understand what a game changer this is, who will?(it almost makes up for the fact I was forced to give up ballet months before starting pointe!)
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