Big Bra Envy from a 32D


While my friend and I were trying on bras at the Care for the Cause event at Linda’s last October, one of Linda’s employees said something that astonished me: “I wish I could wear your bras.” Since this was my first encounter with anyone who envied the bra options available to women above a D cup, I did what any self-respecting full-busted blogger would do: I asked her to write a guest post for us.

My name is Kim and I wear a 32D. A small 32D. Believe me, there really isn’t anything big about a 32D in the first place. (Remember, the smaller the back, the smaller the cup. So a 32D is two full cup sizes smaller than a 36D, for instance.) I have worked as a bra fitter for 7 years and currently lead Linda the Bra Lady’s marketing and social media departments. I still write and talk about bras and breasts all day long , and since Linda’s carries bras from AA-N cup , I have heard the viewpoints of every cup size out there. Now here’s my very own 32D view on things!

My favorite complaint from fuller busted women is “They don’t make anything cute for big boobs.”  I implore you, take a look at the stock at Linda’s – it’s FULL of gorgeous bras and swimwear for D cups and up that we D- women wish we could wear!

Are the bras available to D- women more delicate-looking? This sounds like shoes to me. I wear a size 8 in shoes and I always think that the size 5 sample looks so cute! Then the salesperson brings out a big, ugly size 8 that looks nothing like the delicate shoe on the showroom floor. But just like you wouldn’t wear a size 5 shoe when you really wear an 8, you can’t wear a size 32B bra if you’re really a 38H. And it has to look different – it’s a different size! And more importantly in bras – it has to be made differently to give you the support and shape that you want. A “delicate” little bra is totally useless to a fuller bust. Not only will it look terrible, but a flimsy bra will feel terrible, too. I have to be honest. I’m happy that I can wear some bras that are a little more “delicate”, but I feel like they accentuate the “petiteness” of my bosom. I want to look buxom sometimes, too! And to do so, I have to reach for a padded push up bra. And there’s nothing delicate about a lot of padding. Have you ever worn a water bra? Didn’t think so. Guess who has! ;)

As far as more variety, in the world of underwear, I know that there are more companies that carry only B-DD cup or A-D cup, but they are a dime a dozen. I mean, I used to work for years for a very sexy and well-designed company (that will go unnamed) that only made A-D cups, and they were just decoration. They really didn’t support very well. I loved these bras, don’t get me wrong, but I put a lot more stock into well-constructed bras that do their job. And their “job” is not just to be pretty. A bra’s job is to lift and shape.

As a D-, I wish I could fill bras out like this!

AH! If only.

Here’s another sexy full coverage number that I can’t fill out.

Waaaah!

Really, my bust is not really that petite, but I have almost no fullness in the middle. I really have to rely on my bra to shape my breasts into a nice forward, round, somewhat full shape.  I can never fill out full coverage bras or very open shaped bras that are made to accommodate fuller breasts.  I’ve learned to own my shape and enjoy wearing plunging v-necks–again, like NO breast tissue in the middle of my chest, no kidding–but wow I wish I could fill out a sassy bra like this!
There’s just no way. My bust would never fill it up, even in the right size. Size is just one part of a good fit – style and cup shape is a biggie!

Also, I am a big retro fan and love the style of pin ups from the 1950’s. That buxom, curvy look is so feminine, and I wish I could fill out a sassy bra and dress the part!

Truly, I’d love to walk around for a day (maybe a week, or a month?) as a 32G! One of my favorite sizes. I’ve helped girls who are a 32G who have cried because of their newfound size, horrified by their big busts. I try to be understanding. A woman’s view of her body is such a personal thing. But, if only she knew that little boobies like mine wish they could look as glamorous as hers!  I think full breasts are gorgeous.

Ultimately, though, I wouldn’t change a thing. Here’s why: I think I have a different view than most women in general because of my vast experience with breasts. I have been fitting bras since I was 19 years old. It has given me great perspective on my body and my breasts. At 19, I was in college for theater and surrounded by super thin, waif-like dancers and actresses. I hated my body. Then, I started working at Linda’s and saw naked women all day long. It took less than a week for me to be thankful for what I have!  It sounds terrible, but it was a real eye opener for me. I saw very droopy breasts, post surgical breasts, totally uneven breasts and mastectomies. You name it – I’ve seen it. So, that being said, I do not think my breasts are perfect, but I wouldn’t trade them in. I’m happy to have what I have. I’m down right proud of my boobies! (I also make it a mission to tell young women all the time to be thankful for their perky little bodies. They won’t stay that way forever, ladies!)

I am also thankful that I have such a vast library of bra styles and knowledge at my fingertips, so I know how to dress them up, pump them up, put them here, put them there, etc., etc. I’m sure that if I didn’t know what I know about bras and boobs, I’d probably want to trade them in everyday. And honestly, that’s how every  woman in any size cup feels if she isn’t “braducated”. The grass is always greener. Those that have them don’t want them, and those that don’t have them want them. My best advice is to love what you have, get a proper bra fitting, and learn to dress for your bust – not someone else’s.

Comments

  1. Great post! I have to say it’s funny that you mentioned 32G as the prefect size because I have to admit that’s the size I always wished I would be (and I’m coming at this from the other end of the spectrum… as a 28J). The band is big enough that most brands carry it, G cups include a lot more brands than stock J’s. You can actually find some strapless bras and basques in that size and tons of swimwear but they aren’t small either (actually just one cup size down from my own in terms of volume). Plus, if I had a larger back size it would actually give me a nipped in waist look.

    All that is to say, the grass is ALWAYS greener on the other side. It comes down to learning your options, accepting them and owning them. It definitely took me longer to find brands that work well with my breasts but once I did, wow what a difference!

    That’s interesting what you said too about struggling to find supportive bras in smaller size. It’s not something I really thought about but it definitely make sense. I’d also guess that it’s easier for a women with large breasts to know she’s in the wrong size and get refitted than a woman with smaller breasts because some of the signs of a poor fit aren’t as obvious.

    • Gosh, so many women with smaller breasts walk around in the wrong size. Sometimes petite breasts are the worst offenders because they can “make do” and it’s not as “obvious.” But WOW! Once I fit someone in the right size, they always feel better. Petite breasts are still breasts and need to be supported and in the correct size.

    • I am not as big breasted as some of you ladies, but I am a 32G, so I had to jump in here!

      I have spent many years in non-fitting, crappy, uncomfortable bra’s that don’t fit my body, only to find out 5 days ago why this is so.

      For many years, I was given a 36ddd, or a 36dd etc., by salespeople who didn’t refer me to a store with real sizes because they just wanted to sell me what they had in their stores. Many years later, I have a plate in my neck and deep crevices in my shoulders because of it.

      It really pisses me off. I think some of it is because of where I live. Until recently, there weren’t many good stores in the area I live in, and the stores I could afford to go to didn’t have nice bra’s with a well trained staff either.

      But, I’ve paid the price in another way, so I think that women should not consider price. Invest in comfort, health, and your good looks no matter what size bra you wear, because every woman should feel like a goddess, and you are worth it!

  2. I once saw a BBC documentary called My Big Breasts and Me. It was about 3 women with large breast and what their lives were like. On of the women took her smaller busted friends out wearing her bras stuffed with stocking filled with sugar, so they could walk a mile in her shoes.

    It was funny. You might want to grab a 32G and give it a try. You might find that being a D might be a bit better.

  3. Oh, so been there on the beautiful D+ bras envy-trip! Being a bra enthusiast I spend a lot of time looking at D+ bras.
    Well, I’m a 30D, I lost some weight, I’m between a 30C and 30D now… so many great brands I can’t wear anymore!

    e.g. the lovely Masquerade Rhea in black or antique…

  4. Thanks for sharing my Bra Diva Kim’s story! Many women in my bra fitting shops want more breast or less breast, etc. and my fitters get to see the pros and cons of every size. Kim’s right, the best way to feel good about what you have is to get a proper bra fitting :D

    XO
    Linda the Bra Lady

  5. What bras have you found that fit those of us with no fullness in the middle? I wish I could come to NY for a fitting!

  6. This post is really brilliant. Truly, when I saw the title I thought it was going to make me sad, but it made me so happy. I admit to having times that I definitely wish I was a G-cup–like June said, so many adorable bras end at a G-cup, and even when I squish myself and cheat I still need at the very least a GG. But, I think you are so right to say that we should learn to work with the body we actually have. That’s one of the things that stopped me from getting a reduction when I used to want one–I realized that even when my boobs made me sad, they were still MY boobs. They were a part of me – literally – and that made me realize that I would fight to defend and ‘support’ them just like I would do for a close friend or family member even if that person drove me crazy sometimes.

    There’s also the very valid point that there are pros and cons to being any size, so no matter what size we are we all have to come to terms with our body.

    I like the way my best friend put it when I asked her once if she ever wanted smaller boobs. She said “Maybe back before I got used to them, I would have wanted that, but now that I accept them, it would be a lot harder not to have them.”

  7. I love this post so much. I remember forcing myself into a 32D years ago and cursing my stupid boobs because IT. JUST. WOULDN’T. FIT. And those La Senza bras were so pretty and delicate, as you say. And so readily available!

    Now that I can find pretty, delicate, lacy bras in my size, I’m embracing my boobs. Why wouldn’t I? They look perky and clothes fit fine. This is why finding the right bra is important. Otherwise I’d probably be saving for a breast reduction now just to fit into whatever’s available at the local mall (it was my biggest wish as a teenager).

  8. I actually think there is a point about D+-bras in general being more well constructed. There is a hard to find a brittish H-cup that is not well made. It might not suit ones shape, but it is definitly well made.

    When it comes to B, C and D-cups there is a ton of bras out there that really isn’t that good, however as the need of support isn’t as crucial as with the larger cup sizes (though it definitly is still a need) which means that it isn’t as easy to spot a “bad bra”. The D-cups I know have been amazed of how much difference it makes to them to go from an ordinary brand to one of the large-cup brands that usually actually starts as a D-cup.

    • Being a D cup, means having access to both A-D and D+ brands!
      Shape and fullness is another matter, but knowing women around that size, I really don’t think of a 32D as small.

  9. I’m a 32 GG and I think women don’t realize that back pain that comes with having that size! I lost 60 pounds severa years ago in the hopes of losing some boobage. I guess I lost some, but it seems the band size just went down, and the cup size got bigger! I am actually going for Breast reduction surgery on August 15…less than 2 weeks. Insurance has approved me to go down to a 32 D. I’m very excited because I’m an active girl who works out 5 or 6 days a week. I am so tired of this back pain, and I am REALLY excited about wearing strapless bras and spaghetti straps. As it stands now my chest is too heavy to wear strapless bras.

    I am a little worried I will feel flat and now after reading this I’m REALLY worried!!

    • Darlene C. says:

      DON’T WORRY, Carly! It takes a lot of courage, energy and resolution to get to where you are, and I know you’re going to be super pleased with your new bust line. See Tammy’s latest “The Rack” guest post for reassurance. HOWEVER, take it with a grain of salt that the surgeon actually understands cup sizes. You may not be as small as a D when the surgery is over, but you’ll definitely be much smaller than a GG.

    • Im a 32G, 5ft 1 in height with a small waist and wide hips. My boobs are way too big and also the back pain, headaches and unwanted attention from both men and women is terrible! I am actually going for a reduction in a few weeks, my consultant had recommended i go to a C cup, after looking at C size bra’s in shops I am now really scared as I know this would be far too small. I still want my body to be in proportion and to look more normal, ideally I think I would like to be a DD which still looks small in comparison to what I am now. I have an appointment next week, hopefully it goes well, so fingers crossed!

  10. Wow. I love this post. I have EXACTLY the same boobs. They describe mine perfectly. I have to wear some pretty ridiculous bras in effort to look like I have any kind of impressive clevage, and yet 32D’s fit pretty perfectly in most instances. I’m still at the point where I am fairly willing to trade in/upgrade mine, but I worry about things like money, things going wrong pre/during/post op, and hitting the point where I have to give them up or start aging disgracefully. I don’t know what to do, but at least I know there is someone out there with the same boobs! Maybe I should just be a bra fitter for a career to gain the same outlook!

  11. Oh my! I just went to get refitted for the first time in 2 years without my kids in tow. That means, I took my time, was in communication with my fitter, and learned about volume vs rib vs letter size. I’m a 32D who wrongly was fitted (in a hurry) as a 36B/possible 34C. I’ve never been big and have a tiny frame and no cleavage, so I felt awkward in everything but thought it was “post-baby boobs”. What a difference having a 32D in a basic cotton makes! I wanted the more stylish ones, but when you find the “one” you just know. Haha. I was expecting more cleavage, but it’s such a relief to know that there are others like yourself who don’t have any filling power. Embracing the V neck now :) thanks a ton for this post!

  12. I love this story. I am very pleased to announce that I am a 32d/30dd :) as a 35 year old mother of three I have been disappointed with my breasts for years. Pre-motherhood I (thought I) was a 36b, post motherhood my cup size went down. About 2 years ago I was fitted into a 32a. (by the way, I’m 4’11” and 105-110 lbs) I contemplated getting implants, then finally worked up the nerve to set up a consultation. A few days before my appointment I discovered a lump on my left breast so I cancelled and made an appointment with a women’s clinic. By chance, I decided to go into a store and was asked if I’d been fitted recently, I hadn’t so of course they took me to the back to do so. I thought she was lying when she said I was a 32d! No way I was a d! While I know this isn’t huge, it was enough to give me the confidence I’d been lacking due to my a cups. Not only am I the proud owner of d size breasts, I’m happy to say my lump has completely vanished along with the severe tenderness and pain I’ve felt for YEARS as an obvious result of being very poorly fitted. (working out has helped perk/firm them up as well) I absolutely LOVE the breasts I was once ashamed of and I’m thrilled I didn’t have to go thru with the surgery to feel this way!

  13. I’m going to be completely honest. As much as I understand how some Bigger-busted women may feel like they have a raw deal, not being able to fill their bras enough or having aches and pains etc, I think there’s been too much hype lately about bigger bras and bra size etc. I’m a 34-AA, as small as you can get, practically flat. Whenever I go into a bra shop I can’t find ANYTHING to fit my size, nothing sexy and nothing attractive, I actually have to go to the training-bra section! So please, all of you ladies with bra size from C cup+, stop complaining! You do have curves, unlike flat-chested girls like me. So please, stop saying how you want more, when you already have enough. You have no idea how horrible is it too be mature and flat chested, everything I wear makes me look boyish or fat as its too baggy. I know its great to celebrate the full-figured woman, but just for a change, I wish there’d be some hype over small breasts and the celebration of small women.

  14. Whoa! I was with you until this part: “It sounds terrible, but it was a real eye opener for me. I saw very droopy breasts, post surgical breasts, totally uneven breasts and mastectomies. You name it – I’ve seen it. So, that being said, I do not think my breasts are perfect, but I wouldn’t trade them in.”

    That doesn’t sound like body-acceptance to me; that sounds like “thank heaven I don’t look like THAT.” To me, true body acceptance has to have room for everyone, so that no one has to look at someone else’s “worse” body to make peace with their own.

    This post wakes up all of the “am I too droopy?” concerns that I thought blogs like this could help me leave behind. I wonder what other women with droopy, post-surgical, uneven, or mastectomy breasts feel when they read this post…left out?

    Ultimately, thinking “full breasts are gorgeous” and being “thankful” for “perky little bodies” is something I could find in the pages of any mainstream men’s magazine. Not interesting, and hurtful to those of us who don’t fit that mold and hate our bodies because of it.

    • JL, I can see where you’re coming from, and you’re right–true body-acceptance doesn’t need to compare to others. But I interpret Kim’s statement that “it sounds terrible” as an admission of weakness in this area. Ideally, none of us would need to look at someone else in order to decide we’ll stop complaining about what we have, but it’s human nature to do so. It isn’t a pretty part of human nature, yet I would rather the writing on this blog reflect true feelings. However, this is also why comments like yours are needed.

      On another note, your comment highlights that just as someone comparing herself to those she considers less fortunate can make her feel more fortunate, the other side of the coin is the temptation to compare ourselves to those we consider more fortunate in order to feel less fortunate. That’s not a strong position to be in either. Yet that’s where this post originated–those of us who are full-busted often feel less fortunate when we see all the adorable little bras that smaller-busted women can wear. To hear someone say she envied us was astonishing to me! Admittedly, having a post evolve from a position of envy isn’t the best way to promote self-acceptance, but it made for a thought-provoking article. And your comment has given me ideas for more thought-provoking articles in the future.

  15. I’m 21 years old and I just went to a lingerie store yesterday, and was professionally fitted for a bra for the first time. I was shocked to hear the lady tell me that I’m a 32D, and I felt kind of dumb- all this time I’ve been wearing a 34B! Crazy. But I definitely feel a lot better with my new purchases that actually fit me a lot better, and I’m going to appreciate bra fitters a lot more now I think.
    And I also agree that women should learn to love their bodies and learn how to dress themselves depending on their body type! :)

    • Darlene C. says:

      No reason to feel dumb, Meg. It’s happened to all of us. I’m just glad you found someone to put you in the right size.

  16. DontKnowMyRealSize says:

    I really do not know where to go for a fitting. I have gone to the local lingerie stores and they have told me a variety of different sizes from a 36C to a 34D to 32DD. I do not know what size I am. The 36 band is huge and so is the 34. I tried the sizes they suggested and either it literally fell off because of the band or I couldnt even close it because of my boobs. Ive settled for a 32DD since it fits pretty O.K but still I feel tight in the cups (half of my boob is spilling out) and too big in the band and my straps are always falling off. With the 32DD I still have the space in between my boobs where the middle part of the bra hangs away from my body (I can put two fingers in it). I am 5′ 6” 123llbs. When I measure under my breasts, its around 26\27 and around the fullest part of my breasts its a 35\36. Can anyone please help me? My boobs,back, and wallet hurt from wearing the wrong size of expensive bras. :(

    • Darlene C. says:

      There are some GREAT bloggers out there with your measurements or similar. I link to them on my blogroll. Check out Braless in Brasil, Boosaurus and Sophisticated Pair. You don’t say where you live, but if there are no well-stocked and expertly-staffed lingerie stores near you, consider trying Butterfly Collection for a Skype fitting. You are going to feel amazing once you find the right size!!

  17. It’s funny how I came across this post at a time when I decided that I had had enough of RTW (ready-to-wear) bras and was going to start making my own. Like many women, I was wearing the wrong size for years. I used to fit into a 34B rather easily, but I began noticing in college that I was getting red marks around my breasts and underwire began to poking into the sides of my breasts. And when I tried putting on a 34C, the cup width was almost there, but I didn’t have enough to completely fill it.

    The problem is that I have wide breasts but they aren’t voluminous. However, I started teaching myself how to sew last summer and I began wondering how I could make my own bras. I’ve been successful at making dresses, pants and shirts, and even my own panties. Why not try making a bra?

    I know my measurements off the top of my head, so I put them into a bra size calculator online and found that I’m supposed to be a 32D! And that makes sense to me. A D cup is usually pretty wide so I know that would cover my breasts well since the C cup barely did, and my band measurement is 30.75.” But I also know that’s not a size that’s easy to find. I know because I have never seen D cup bras with a small band like that in stores.

    All of this to say I’m now working on my first bra and have only made the cups so far (I bought a Kwik Sew pattern that only went up to a C, so I graded the cup pattern pieces up to a D) and I can tell you that it’s going to be a VERY comfortable bra. The 32D cup I have made will cover everything. At least with this homemade bra, it’ll be more comfortable than anything else I’ve ever worn. :)

    • Darlene C. says:

      How ambitious of you, Cecilee. I hope you’ll link here again when you’ve finished your bra. However, you may want to check out online stores for 32D’s. They may be more available than you realize. It’s simply that many brick & mortar stores don’t stock bands that are 32 and under.

  18. Not understanding says:

    I dropped from a 36 F to a 32 D. I don’t see how anyone can go down cups and up in bands. I can tell when my band is too big because it is sliding around and professional fitters who I’ve seen once taught me how to put my breasts in there cups. My 32Ds do not fit at all in a 34 C bands too big and breasts don’t fit ergo for a 36B.

    • Darlene C. says:

      Hmm . . . I wonder what happens when you try a 30E. It’s interesting that you can’t sister-size down in cups and up in bands. Sometimes I can, and sometimes I can’t, depending on combination of brand and style. One reason it works for some women to go down in cup but up in band is that the underwires widen as the band increases. So even though there might not be enough depth, the breast tissue fits the added width.

  19. Hey, I was wondering if any of you gals have gotten mis-measured at Victoria’s Secret? I’m what I believe to be a 32D, considering I used to be a 34DD, but I lost some weight in 2010 due to stress. There was a point when I believed I was as small as a C (Which i know isn’t “Small”, but for me it is when you have DD’s and then they are gone) but when I put on a 32D size bra I always have nice cleavage, and like other 32D ladies I find push-up bras to be uncomfortable as if i’m spilling out. I took my measurements, 26-27 underbust, 32-33 cup size. On Linda’s bra calculator, that puts me between a 30E/30DD or a 30F/30FF. But when I go to Victoria’s Secret,(I order all my bras from there, because of affordability) they measured me at a “True” 32D. I tried on some 32D bras, some felt like they were too small in the cup. Then the same woman who measured me gave a few bras in the styles I liked in a 34C, because 32D was sold out. Those felt FAR too small in the cup! And no matter how I tried to adjust the back as tight as I could, it felt too loose, which affected the support in the cups and made me sag. Ugh, SOOO confused! Now I have know idea what size I am. Part of me is thinking I never really lost much breast volume at all when I lost weight, but my back got really small, causing my breasts to sag more, thus changing the shape rather than cup size. Also, I think alot of these department stores will measure you to the closest size they carry, even if it isn’t the size you should be wearing. Besides, if I am a 30F or something crazy like that, bras in specialty sizes seem to be far more expensive. God, I think I might go full-on amazonian and cut one off and bind my chest! LOL! :)

  20. I loved this post. Informative, introspective, and all on the oh-so delicate topic of . . . boobs! I honestly kind of hate mine. I have been a 32C, but the sides of the cups are pinching me on the outside. Like you Kim, I got absolutely nothing in between my breasts, it’s totaly flat! For years I thought pushing them center was what I could do to make them look more . . . normal? Less Marilyn Monroe’ish? And bras just tend to not have much of a connector in between the cups to keep the girls where they normally sit. Anyway, I’m glad to have come across this little column, because I think I’ve become the dreaded 32D. I just gre another inch this year, I’m 23, and finally 5 foot. Really don’t need my boobs growing and growing and growing. But you’re right, trying to squish into a bra that isn’t wide enough under the bust is too uncomfortable. Having to adjust and feeling the bra drop down off my boobs but hold up in back is stupid. So here I am, graduating to 32D. I just wish I could try one on in store.

    • Actually, just bought some 32D bras today and they feel so comfy!! And I have to say, 32D is in fact large on my body. So for me and every guy I have ever dated thinks a C and larger is big. I cannot imagine carrying around G cups . . .

  21. I Totally understand the “delicate” part, when I go bra shopping I see cute little A, B, & C cups, but then my size (if the store even carries it, which is rare) 32DD looks completely different. But I like my boobs, they’re not TOO big, and they’re defidently not small. I’m a bit glad to be curvy, even if it means getting plus sizes in little girls jeans because I’m 4’10 and have a large butt.

  22. Thank you for your post.
    I believe you have to work with what you got. Especially when the years go by, having children, gravity, etc. :-)

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