The Moth is my favorite show on NPR, and I loved the recording of Rachel Dratch’s Horsemeat story that aired on December 17. At first I only liked it because it was hilarious. Then Mr. Campbell enlightened me that Rachel Dratch was on SNL for seven years, and he thought she might even have big boobs. A Google image search proved him right, and it revealed that she’d published a book in 2012.
A book! I downloaded it on the chance it contained a quotable excerpt about living with large breasts, and of course it did. She shares an experience that many of us can relate to:
Back in my twenties, I caught a glimpse of myself on tape at Second City, saw how horrible my posture was, and decided, “That’s it! I’m going to stand up straight!” This really happened: About an HOUR after I had that conscious thought, I was walking down Belmont Street in Chicago. I think I was wearing a white T-shirt, and a guy who was dressed like a seventies pimp, complete with one of those puffy patchwork hats and skinny bell-bottom pants, said to me in a low and slow and creepy voice as he walked by: “Big Tiiiits.”
As gross as that was, I wasn’t going to let it deter my posture mission. However, the very next day as I was entering the theater, and standing up straight, some guys yelled out of a car, “Nice tits!” Was I in some movie where a character makes a decision, and reactions happen to them this fast? I don’t mean good reactions–I mean this is why it’s better to hide what you’re packin’ unless you are Ice-T’s wife Coco, and you want to make a living off of that attention.
When her book launched, a Village Voice interviewer asked her, “And big breasts. Are you still self-conscious about yours?”
She answered, “I would say so, but I haven’t been asked about it in a long time, so I guess I forget about it more than I used to. It’s hard to find clothes that fit.”
That’s another experience we can relate to, isn’t it?