Before you think I’ve gone off the deep end, let me just say that I believe there is such a thing as perfect fit and the standards to determine it. But I’ve made two realizations recently:
1. All my RELATIVES are wearing the wrong size. Last month, Lingerie Addict‘s and Bra Stop‘s blogs got me thinking about the commonly quoted statistic that “85% of women are wearing the wrong bra size”. If my relatives and acquaintances had been the survey sample, the statistic would have been 100%. Especially sad, some of these are women who should know better, including:
- my niece, who I took for her first professional bra fitting when she was 16 (she’s now 20, and her underbust is 28″, but she was wearing a 36D to our fitting last month); and
- my sister, who took me for my first professional bra fitting when I was 16.
When I first heard the 85% statistic, I thought it was just a matter of time before that number dwindled down to zero. Once women saw and felt the difference of a proper fit, they would never again subject themselves to constant strap adjustments or quadraboobs.
However, it’s been a few years now, and that number doesn’t seem to have budged. Lingerie Addict validly questions the number’s legitimacy, and the cited press release itself only gives reasons that women don’t get fitted rather than discusses how (or if) Debenhams arrived at the number in the title. But like the Bra Stop blog author, my own anecdotal evidence supports this number. What percentage of your female relatives and acquaintances do you think is wearing the wrong bra?
[Just a note–my mother and niece are no longer wearing the wrong size after our trip to Unique Lingerie in Ocala, but I’m afraid it’s only a matter of a year or so before they return to their bad habits. More on that in my bonus 3rd realization below.]
2. Sometimes fit really is in the eye of the beholder–if the beholder is a guy. I have a feeling guys love it when a 32F woman wears a 36D bra because it makes her breasts (a) look enormous and (b) bounce more. Guys also like quadraboobs. Just last week Mr. Campbell asked if I had a bra that would give me extra jiggle on top like a woman he saw crossing the street. I do have such a bra, I told him, but only because it’s too small. Then I explained the concept of quadraboob to him. To him, that’s a perfect fit.
3. I am a bra nerd.
This has nothing to do with fit being relative, but it’s another recent revelation for me. I discovered this when I took my mom and niece for their fitting last month. Just parking in front of the store made me feel that all was right with the world. Then I realized that for my mother and niece, this was just another shopping trip. And it dawned on me that proper fit just isn’t that important to a vast population of women . . . perhaps even 85% of the population doesn’t really care whether or not they’re wearing a perfectly fitting bra.
For me, a breast encased in a perfectly fitting bra is a thing of beauty–both the bra and the breast complement each other. Pragmatically, the right size bra gives its wearer both physical and psychological support. I want everyone to experience this. But I’m learning that not even the experience of perfect fit is enough to make it a consistent priority in some women’s lives. Everyone has their own priorities and passions. Since well-fitting and beautiful bras are one of mine, I’ve become a bra nerd.
Thanks for linking to me…it's so interesting to hear what others have to say on the subject! 🙂
Treacle, your blog is great for getting people thinking.
Ewwww, quadraboob, yuk. I can't believe guys like that! Wow.
I love well fitted bras, but I don't like to pay as much as they cost and I'm always in Target looking at the super cute bras and trying to figure out if I could squeeze myself into them!
Bra geeks unite! (We'd better, because no one else cares). Right now i'm all sorts of bent out of shape about bra size calculators that don't work and how wrong wrong WRONG it all is! you know?! 😀
Not a single woman in my life wears the right bra. They all look at me like I'm crazy. There's no trustworthy lingerie shop in my immediate area, so one would have to do trial and error through mail order, and that's just a pain in the butt. You'd have to be as stubborn as me! I got my mother to at least attempt the process, but she gave up after the first package.
My husband can spot an ill-fitting bra. He loves how my properly sized bras bring the girls front and forward. He is, however, quite resistant to the price of new bras, and does encourage me to just shop the rack at Walmart. 🙁
Have you ladies seen this Bra Calculator? http://www.atlastravel.nazwa.pl/mini/
Have you guy seen this Bra Calculator? It's been a pretty accurate one for most women I know that have tried it. It's the one I recommend to everyone.
COMPLETELY agree… My sisters are much smaller breasted than me, and it just doesn't seem to be important to them. I think its because they don't need the same support I do… And so for them, buying a bra is the same as buying underwear: they want to be able to go to Target and buy something cute and cheap. Very frustrating!
Aamba and Karen, when you find something that works from Target or Walmart, you're going to HAVE to alert the rest of us.
So great to meet another bra geek, Amanda!
And Anna, I offered to bring my niece's smaller sister w/ us to the fitting last month. Her response was, "I don't even need to wear a bra!"
My Mom and Sister are only in proper sizes because I fit them myself. A few of my best friends are in something at least close to the right size because I made them go get a fitting. Of course, the only one who consistently shops for proper fitting bras is also the only one as big as me (bigger, actually). It always seems to be those of us with large cups that care more about the proper fit. And yet small boobs have so much to gain from the right bra, like cleavage. Lots of cleavage.
That's interesting, C.E. Welch. I assumed the only advantages to smaller breasts being properly fitted was (a) comfort and (b) not sagging as much w/ age. Didn't even consider the cleavage factor!
My friend who thinks she's a 36A (and the fitter put in a 32D) thinks she's cheating when she wears a pushup bra.
Re: #2 – wow… just wow. I think I knew this, but to read about it is ovewhelming. Quadraboob. Wow.
My problem is that if I *do* wear a bra that fits the "look, cleavage!" criteria that my husband has, I have to keep readjusting it. I would MUCH rather wear a bra that I don't need to realign, and he wonders where my cleavage went. Cleavage and proper-fitting bras just don't seem to work for me.
Okay, Becky, I have to hear more about this. Perhaps a guest post about what you've tried and hopefully feedback from readers w/ suggestions? Not to be able to capitalize on your cleavage is a crime!
By the way, the quadraboob photo in this photo did NOT catch Mr. Campbell's eye. All he said was, "That bra doesn't fit." What??
I would consider that, although I think that I first need to get off my behind and make a serious attempt to get a bra that truly fits. My biggest issue is bras that fit in the fitting room, then promptly lose their shape and support after a couple washings. That, combined with the fact that my girls are real and have fed a baby, means that I haven't ever had success wearing anything labeled "demi", or "push-up" because the girls are too likely to ooze away from their optimized location.
I admit it – I've nearly given up on finding properly fitting bras over the last 6 months, and have relied almost entirely on wearing compression-style sports bras most days. Obviously, I'm in need of an intervention, and maybe this will give me the incentive to figure out exactly what will work, and be willing to dole out a little more than I'm used to do get it.
I also have a specific need that I have to get sorted out soon – I am in a wedding in late August, and I'm wearing a dress that has a vee-back that is about an inch too low for me to wear one of my typical go-to bras. The shoulder straps are fine, but I think I'm going to need one of those extenders that allow you to lower the place where the back of the bra comes together, wrapping around the front. 😛 I'm not sure if that'll work for my (?) 34DDs.
Oooh. A low back. I bet you can find something that works for 34DD. The owner at Bra Tenders said she can't find anything to help w/ backless dresses for anyone higher than an F.