This week I was inspired by Darlene’s post about Sofia Vergara’s clothing line for K-Mart. I checked out the options online and decided to go try some of this stuff on. I was especially excited for the following items:

Love the little flounce down the front of the skirt.

Looooove these pants! So tough and fun.

The infamous bustier dress.

The first thing I noticed about these clothes is that the material feels very cheap. Not a lot of natural fiber content. But that’s about what I would expect for such low prices, so I wasn’t too put off by that. Then, of course, I started trying things on. And nothing—nothing!—looked good.

Everything shown here is a size small except the bustier dress and the pants, which are both size 6. First, the bat-wing dress:

Oh look, a shapeless sack. Flattering!

Next, those “motocross” pants I liked so much on K-Mart’s website:

Blech. My legs look like stumps. They’re too long to be “ankle-length” on me and the ankles and knees are too loose and bunchy. I like that the rise is fairly high while still avoiding Mom-jeans territory, but the back of the waist gapped a lot, so they’re still not good.

Here’s me standing on tip-toes to simulate high heels. Still didn’t win me over, though.

As for that bustier dress, yeah there’s no way the one Sofia wore in the commercial was the same dress that you pull off the rack. It doesn’t look nearly as bad in the photo as it did in real life, but trust me when I say the cups aren’t even close to being deep enough or tall enough.

Here it is with a bra, so you can really see how little coverage there is:

Next up is a red cowl-neck shirt. I love bright red, and there were quite a few items in this same shade, but unfortunately this one is completely limp.

Here’s another bright red top. In the store, I thought this looked like a big ugly sack, but now I think it looks pretty cute in the photo. Maybe I’ll go back and try it again. It was also available in a range of colors, including basic black and a really pretty sea green.

Here’s a purple ruched dress. Ruching is usually my best friend, and this dress was certainly body-hugging (good), but I still didn’t like it enough to buy. The sleeves were also really tight and I hated the ruffles on the wrists.

Last is a simple mock wrap top. This is another style that’s usually good for curvy gals, but there was something off about this shirt.

Here it is with the cross-over piece tucked under my boob instead of going across it:

Here’s the same shirt in a delicious bright blue (one of my other favorite colors to wear). But something’s still not right…

Ah ha! From straight on, you can see that the cross-over piece of fabric cuts diagonally across the middle of the breast instead of wrapping below it. I really, really love this color and I also really like the petal look at the bottom of the shirt, but it felt like I was wearing a straight jacket.

So final impression: A resounding “meh.” I might go back to try that drapey top again, with a friend so I can get a second opinion. And I could maybe be convinced to buy the blue wrap top because I love the color SO MUCH, but overall I wasn’t very impressed.