Going Big No Matter Our Size

Tonight the British reality show Big Ballet makes its stateside premiere on Ovation, and I so wish I had cable because aren’t these images absolutely enticing?

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There are dancers who wear DD+ bras in this show!

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You know how I feel about the bodies of professional ballet dancers, so I can’t wait for the opportunity to watch this.  For more on the story, you can read this WSJ article (but be warned if you watch the video–Tanya Rivero’s attitude is infuriating!) and this article from The Guardian.

Another story, this time about 18-year-old tennis player Taylor Townsend, is a great reminder that a woman’s natural size has nothing to do with her abilities and worth. Today, 205th-ranked Taylor Townsend has advanced to the third round of the French Open after beating the 20th-seeded player; but in 2012 she was benched from competing for a wild card into the U.S. Open because her coaches “wanted to improve her fitness, a code word for weight.” Imagine the devastation that Taylor must have felt. Today, her coach is Zina Garrison, who formerly ranked No. 3 worldwide and struggled with bulimia during her tennis career.  This is one reason she wanted to work with Townsend: “‘I didn’t want her to go through some of the same problems I had, and it seemed that it was heading that way.”

Taylor Townsend

There is a lot of lip service given to size acceptance, but it’s refreshing to see acceptance in action in these stories of women who are forging forward as themselves instead of forcing themselves to be anything less.

Corporate Curves Report: I’m busty and I know it! – Choosing Our Feelings

Feelings, we can’t escape them. But what I learned this week in a Redesigning 925 training is that yes, we can choose our attitude. Are we responsible or are we a victim? It was all about changing habits and choosing our attitude.

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We had a very eye-opening exercise where we first had to pair up and pick a true story about a work situation where we felt like a victim and tell the story from that perspective to our partner. Then our partner needed to evaluate if it indeed sounded like we were a victim. That was all nice and easy as there’s always room at the victims coffee table, BUT then came the curve ball!

Now we had to stick to the same story but turn tables in our minds and take a responsible outlook on the same situation and take full accountability for the event, no matter what we had chosen.

I remembered that lesson the next day when in a meeting I kept noticing how blatantly a coworker kept talking to my bust. I felt disappointed and awkward. I mean, people at the office know that I’m booby and it’s not like he had not seen me before.

They just are there! And sometimes they come in handy my little dog seems to think :)

They just are there! And sometimes they come in handy my little dog seems to think. :)

Another occasion happened later that night when I went to the gym for my Fustra session. I was wearing my Curvy Kate Wild at Heart plunge bra (that is the second day this year I have not worn a Freya Deco :) !!!), and when I took my dress off in the ladies locker room, there were these two super fit girls gawking at my bust with their jaws open. I felt a little hurt or probably more self conscious–most girls at the gym tend to be super fit and small busted.

Curvy Kate Wild bra

Curvy Kate Wild bra

But what I heard was not, “OMG she’s so big!” Instead they were wondering where I get my bras since they give such a nice shape! So it was much more in my head. Our own heads can be our worst enemies.

Pepperberry Faves and No One’s Perfect

I’m still on a writing hiatus while I wait for inspiration, so in the meantime, I’ll share my favorite Pepperberry pieces from their new collection.

pepperberry spring 2014 faves

Of the three, I’m most tempted by the purple shirt dress because it’s multi-seasonal and versatile. The jacket is only good for cool weather, but it also seems super versatile. I’ll be sure to update you if I buy one of these. (As for style personality, I think these are leaning toward Randi, with a nod to Clare.)

Oh! And I also need to eat my words about ordinary bodies a little bit. Just as Henriette Steenstrup reminded me that none of us are ordinary, this Huffington Post article reminds us that nobody’s perfect–not even Amy Adams. Thanks to a reader for doing more research than I did (although I still think she looks pretty perfect in American Hustle)!

“‘Some of these actresses or public personas who are very public about their disciplined diets, more power to them. I just don’t see the point,” Adams tells Allure. “I’m just not going to be one of those people photographed in a bikini where people are like, ‘OMG, look at Amy!’ I mean, it might be OMG, but not for the reasons I want.”

[. . . ]

Perfect isn’t normal, nor is it interesting,” she declares, adding of her looks, “I have no features without makeup. I am pale. I have blond lashes. You could just paint my face — it’s like a blank canvas. It can be great for what I do.”

 

Fitting In ~ Love the One You’re With

If you can’t be with the one you love, honey,
Love the one you’re with.
Love the one you’re with.

I’ve seen a few lingerie bloggers’ recommendations for Valentine’s Day goodies, and I’m thinking about love and what I’ll be doing for my Valentine this year. First, I should tell you what I did last year. Late last spring was a milestone anniversary for my spouse and me. I’m the less romantic of the two of us; I forget gift giving occasions with regularity. My sweetie is the opposite, and never fails to mark a birthday or Hallmark occasion with some expression of love.

As a surprise, I decided for Valentine’s Day to celebrate with a month of daily treats and surprises for him: breakfast in bed, a heart shaped cookie left on the pillow, making favorite dinners, leaving hand-written notes, a foot massage while watching TV, that sort of thing. I confess that some of the inspiration was an attempt to butter up my Valentine in the hopes of getting a pair of diamond earrings for our anniversary. The earrings never materialized, but it hardly mattered. I had fun planning a daily treat. It’s not easy to come up with something new each day, especially on a limited budget, but it was a great thing to do. I learned something about refreshing love with a commitment to acting in the best interests of the one you love. It became no longer what I would get out of it, but entirely what I could put into it.

This year, I’m thinking about what loving myself entails, particularly as the shape I inhabit isn’t my first choice. I’ll be my own Valentine for this month. Each day for the month of February, I’m doing something good for me. These are treats, surprises and good-for-me actions. Some are new routines and others are out of the ordinary, behaviors to get out of a rut and to remind me to love me by acting in the best interests of me. I haven’t given up on last year’s Valentine, but he still has that cellophane wrapped heart-shaped cookie, so that needs a new approach. In the meantime . . .

How do I love me? Let me count the 28 ways . . . .

  1. Started guitar lessons. Love this mind and want it to learn new things.
  2. Gave myself a manicure. Love these nails and need them short to play the guitar.
  3. Walked up eight flights of stairs to my office. Love these legs, and walking up 132 steps each work day will get them toned.
  4. Making a deposit into a Roth IRA. Love my future self, and I’ll appreciate that savings someday.
  5. Getting a Fitbit. Love this heart beating inside my chest, and going to treat it well with 10,000 steps per day.
  6.  Getting my five servings of vegetables & fruit. Love this colon and giving it plenty of fiber.
  7.  Exfoliate & moisturize. Love this skin I’m in with a Spa-At-Home day.

And so on, each day for the whole month. Ideas welcomed.

What I’ve learned just a few days in is that it takes exactly as much effort to love a body I’m less than thrilled with as it does to love one that is flawless. And I’m just as deserving with this shape as I’d be with any other.