Why I Love Busty Dressing . . . Guidelines

I know that some of you bristle at being told what you can and cannot wear, but I love the structure that “rules” provide. Admittedly, they can be stifling, but have you considered their wardrobe-expanding nature as well?

Here’s an example. After learning that my underbust is narrower than my waist at the Knit to Flatter workshop, Amy Herzog told us that it can be extremely flattering to create a line at the narrowest part of our torso–with a belt, for instance. “But won’t that make me look like I have boobs on a tray?” I asked.

Don’t do it if it makes you feel uncomfortable,” she said immediately.

Guess what? When I’m considering a change from how I’ve always done things, the last thing I need to hear is, “Stay in your rut.” The logic of her idea had just opened my world, but when that happens, my first reaction is to look for a reason that the new idea won’t work for me. I need a little hand-holding and cheerleading, à la “Come on, try it! You’ll look amazing! You won’t look silly. You won’t look like you’re all boob!”

Amy didn’t give me that, but she did tell us about Stephanie Pearl-McPhee, a well-known knitter who described her own self-consciousness after finishing a sweater with a line running parallel to and directly beneath her bust. I love this post.

horizontal line beneath big bust can flatter narrowest part

What I’ve come to realize is that there is more than one way to create a horizontal line beneath my bust, and that one reason I’ve never done so with a sweater like Stephanie’s is that I could never find one to fit my large breasts. You know–it’s the old boob bifurcation problem. (By the way, I’m super excited to have just discovered that Stephanie is knitting the exact same sweater that I’m going to begin! And my yarn is supposed to arrive today. I can’t wait!)

The trick with rules is not to let them rule you–simply let them guide you. Figure out the logic behind them and how or if that logic applies to you. I was absolutely delighted with the comments to Monday’s post about sleeve length because, as much as I dream of being a big bust dressing expert who knows exactly what every busty woman should wear all the time, the reality is that I’m simply a busty woman who loves to try to figure things out and share what I learn as I go along.

Unfortunately, I can also be pretty rigid about some of the rules that I’ve learned. I realized this when I found Girl With Curves through Already Pretty last month and became mesmerized by Tanesha Awasthi’s outfit posts in her Girl With Curves gallery.  Although it isn’t obvious from every post, I’m pretty sure that Tanesha qualifies as full-busted.

 

full bust bra size on girl with curves

If you study her outfits, you will see that many of them follow the “rules”. There’s a lot of figure-hugging going on, together with a lot of wraps, scoops and V’s. But if she stuck with these looks alone, her blog would be pretty ho-hum.

big bust dressing rules and girl with curves

She also wears items I would automatically avoid in a store and creates outfits with them that I don’t particularly love (although I do like the rust ruffled top, the tan turtle neck with taffeta skirt and the loose, baggy sweater below).

bad busty dressing from girl with curves

My two least favorite elements in these outfits are (1) the “mountain of boobs” look that results from fabric going all the way up to the neck; and (2) bagginess. Does my opinion matter? No. She still looks amazing, doesn’t she?

Finally, she takes pieces that I consider off limits to women with large busts and comes up with looks that even I can get behind. Do you know why I think these work? Because they follow other rules!

how to break busty rules and get away with it by girl with curves

Clockwise from top left: (1) breast pockets on her denim shirt don’t matter when worn over her eye-catching dress; the stripes and color get all the attention while the shirt creates a vertical line; (2) it’s a high neck but the color makes her look so alive and the fitted bodice shows off her shape; (3) this fussy print is overwhelming, but notice the simplifying, eye-catching detail on the heels and bag (go here for a better look: http://girlwithcurves.com/post/46577044607/print-on-print); (4) the shirt hem coming out from beneath the hem of her jacket keeps it from looking too boxy; (5) amazing sheath dress that hugs her curves–who cares about anything else?; (6) high neck poplin could be all boobs, but the necklace and jacket share the limelight.

Big Bust Bra Fitting Advice Really Does Sink In

Winona Ryder looks a lot like my niece here.

Today is the two-week anniversary of my 22-year-old niece moving in with us. Because of dual enrollment, she completed her college degree at the end of 2010 and then taught English in South Korea for the 2011-2012 school year. This past fall, she walked 500 miles of the Camino de Santiago, lived for a month with a family in Spain, and spent some time in Switzerland. Now she needs to earn money so that she can travel some more. I suggested she look for a job in New York City, where all car-less world travelers belong. She thought that was a great idea, and here she is.

Before she left for Korea, I took her to a bra fitting in Ocala, Florida, and hoped for the best. When she arrived in New York, I resisted talking about her bras for a few days, but I couldn’t suppress a few surreptitious glances to check her fit. FINALLY the subject came up! She was wearing the Rhonda Shear bra that she’d purchased in Ocala. What a disaster–way too loose and way too much room in the base of the cups. Unlike the Rhonda Shear bra I reviewed last September, this one had hooks in back, but it was fastened on the tightest hooks. Thankfully, she told me that she rarely wore it out of the house.

Instead, she wore some really cute bras that she’d found in Korea. The cups don’t contain all of her side breast tissue, but at least the bands are super snug. Although my niece wasn’t wearing perfectly fitting bras, she had figured out that tight bands gave her more support.

Curious about her size, I took her measurements: 27″ underbust and 34″ apex. She’d lost an inch from her underbust while overseas! Then I pulled out two balconettes I’d been saving for her, leftover from the Busty Clothing Swap: a 30G Parfait by Affinitas and a 28H Bravissimo. The cups in the Parfait wrinkled at the seams, but the Bravissimo was gorgeous on her. I can’t wait to take her for an “official” fitting at a boutique in New York soon (once she’s saved more money)!

Understanding my best bra fit has been an evolutionary process–I pick up a few tips here, discard a few bad habits there–so I was pleased to see the same thing happening for my niece. I hope this encourages you in your own efforts to help others discover the joy of a great-fitting bra. The people we try to help may not be able to take in everything at once, but if they’re taking in anything we share with them, it can make a difference.

It turns out my niece is also willing to share her overseas bra and boob experiences with us in a series she’s creatively titled “Abreast Abroad”! I hope you enjoy her first post as much as I did. For now, she’s chosen the pen name “Lelaina” [Now changed to Shana to avoid confusion with fellow columnist Leila], from the job-searching character played by Winona Ryder in the 1994 movie, Reality Bites.